A life of two halves.

My life is split into two parts…. Christmas and Festivals. This may sound a little odd given that I have a good job and a home in suberbian Yorkshire and one would not be to blame that thinking a winter at ‘home’ was a quiet and cosy affair that rejuvenated our batteries ready for the forthcoming summer. (A summer when we threw ourselves out to ‘rough it’

- According to my mother-in-law (who is still trying after 15 years of Mr. O and myself spending 6 months a year in various fields ). She believes that unfortunatly my ‘lovely’ home is only a temporary hostel that keeps us warm when the campsites are closed, the music has stopped and even the most dedicated of festival goer has hibernated or gone to warmer festivals abroad.

Christmas is the event that we have in place (invented by festival angels I think) to keep us from climbing the walls living though out the (scary voice required) THE INDOOR MONTHS……. Thank god for Christmas!

Let me explain.

September comes around and as the last tent is packed safely away the children pushed back to school (me knocking off the last of the stray field mud from their shoes and trying to look like a yummy mummy) and I start somehow thinking about Christmas.

You can pretty much guarantee that Asda will creep in the odd box of Christmas cards and either my Mum or Mr. O’s Mum will race to be the first ones to ask us round for Christmas dinner. Of course I play it cool and explain it’s still a long way off and that I will need to see what comes up in the mean time before making a decision on where the Angel Family will be going.

But for all my coolness I’ll have picked up a house magazine that will have inspired me to re-decorate a room, ready for Christmas….

‘now the festival season has finished and before the weather turns cold’ I urge Mr. O ‘and it’ll be all nice for Christmas’… I perswade the husband to agree and so off I go to B&Q, and so I start to decorate

…and while I do…

I find myself planning where the tree will go, what theme I will use and even start to think about how much money I’m planning to spend on the kids. By October the November Ideal Home magazine is out and that of course talks about preparing for December. I will no doubt make a cake (you know it needs to rest) I will have looked at the list of presents you can get for under £20 (ideal home again) and the letter will have come home from school telling me when the kids break up, when the nativity is and other festive nonsense specifically designed to put scummy mummies like me to shame (such as baking minces pies without nuts in case of allergies and using gluten free flour in case of intollerances).

November, I’ll have most definitely have bought some cards ( before they are picked over) relented and told which set of parents we will be visiting over the festive break ( normally we not going to any and staying at home)and may even have started noticing the odd face book status telling me that ‘Jimmy has bought some Christmas cards’. Of course there will be an old lady at work who has told me she’s ‘bought and wrapped everything up’. Oh and in time facebook whips itself into a ‘Christmas is nearly here frenzy!’

By December the world has gone mad;

Facebook status’s talk about parties, cards, presents and troublesome relatives. We are all attending events, nativities, parties and meals. (And updating pictures, videos and status’s appropriately on our return)

We..

eat tons…..drink tons…..smoke tons…..dress up….dance badly at parties…. freeze to death in the cold in our party frocks…. party ….party….. party ….and generally have a ball.

January…

…new year comes around and as the last themed bauble in packed safely away, the children pushed back to school (me knocking off the last of the stray tinsel from their shoes) and I start somehow thinking about Festivals.

You can pretty much guarantee that Asda will creep in the odd ‘outdoor range’ and either Solfest or Shmbala will race to be the first ones to ask us to book them in for the August Bank holiday weekend.

Of course I play it cool and explain it’s still a long way off and that I will need to see what comes up in the mean time before making a decision on where I will be going with my crew this year.

But for all my coolness I’ll have picked up the guardian that will have inspired me to ‘plan for brighter days’, now the festive season has finished and before the weather turns warm we need to start thinking about where we will be going. .

So off I go I start to contact the festie organizers and send them our stuff , I find myself planning where the tents will go, what theme I will use and even start to think about how much money I’m planning to spend on the bunting and workshops.

By February …

Sunrise and Moorfest have open up for early bird tickets, E festivals are adding more and more dates to the diary and I am in talks with everyone from prospective new crew and established festivals.. I will no doubt make new curtains for the pixie pad (my lovely caravan) I will have looked at new welly designs for 2010 (the guardian again) and the emails will have come home from the festie times telling me to think about my first article,

March and April..

I’ll have most definitely have bought some new wellies (most folk buy willies for the winter.. not me) relented and told which festival we will be doing August bank holiday and may even have started noticing the odd face book status telling me thatJimmy can’t wait to get in a field. Of course Glastonbury and Latitude will have sold out without us know even who’s playing and I will have prospective crew coming out of my ears (all wanting to do glasto and non of the small ones) Invoices, health and safety, crew lists and timetables have been written and sent, and face book whips itself into ‘the summer is nearly here frenzy!’

By May

…the festie world has gone mad, face book status’s talk about pre season gigs and launch parties, new tents, log burning stoves and troublesome ticket registration schemes. We are all in various fields around the county. (And updating pictures, videos and status’s appropriately on our return)

We…..

eat tons….drink tons….smoke tons….get dressed up….drink chai and cider….. sing around the fire….grind in the reggae tent…..rave in the dance tent…get soaked in the rain…..stuck in the mud….party… party…. party…. and generally have a ball.

See…. it’s not that I don’t have other things in my life; it’s just that they all fall in and around these two things.

I awake in January ready for life outdoors, ready to throw myself out of suburbia and into the green green grass of temporary home. September is bloody depressing and without Christmas what would we do?

I fully believe Christmas was invented by the festival angels to keep us sane and well practiced for the complications and strains of the best months of our years……

PEACE

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